OP/ED: Oops ..where did you go??!?
By Kyra Hoggan
It seems like so long since I penned a column, and spoke directly to you, our readers, whom I value so deeply.
I’m sorry for that, and for The Source’s somewhat diminished content in recent weeks – rest assured, we’ll be right back to inspiring hate mail and death threats in short order. LOL. (Is it okay to say “LOL” in a column, if said column is online? Hmmm. My former publisher would have a stroke. An upside to forging ahead – I never much liked the man. LOL!) Truth is, things have been more than a little nutty in my life of late. I accepted a position at the helm of the West Kootenay branch of St. John Ambulance (it’s a part-time gig, so I’ll still have plenty of time for The Source) in Trail, and went to Kelowna for training last week. St. John Ambulance is supremely cool – I’ll tell you a bit about the longest-standing compassionate society in human history (not to mention my new employer) in future articles. First, though, let me explain that, while the job is part-time, the training is not – it is, in fact, so comprehensive and intensive that I often found myself feeling grateful that I was training in a place with ambulances and lots of people who know CPR. I wasn’t ACTUALLY drowning … but I’m pretty sure the sensation was similar. Eek. And speaking of sensation, what made the training manageable were the sensational people delivering it. We laughed often, and sincerely. Someday, I’ll have to tell you about the rubber ducky….but that’s for another time. And maybe a more restricted audience. LOL (take THAT, mean publisher guy!). At any rate, I’d train all day, go back to my hotel room and work a little on The Source, then hunker in bed surrounded by the 800,000 books, manuals, operations binders and paperwork they were handing me throughout the day. Either everyone flounders at first, or I’m the Meryl Streep of administrators, because my trainers never once tried to have me committed for hopeless idiocy or fired me for gross incompetence due to just-not-getting-it syndrome, despite my constant fear they might, and with cause. To get a sense of just how hard I was working, know this: I was in the retail Mecca of Kelowna for an entire week, and never ONCE went shoe shopping. Gasp! I still managed, Wednesday night, to put out what I thought was a pretty strong issue of The Source ….but that’s less to my credit than because I wantonly stole terrific copy from my Lone Sheep partners, The Nelson Daily, The Rossland Telegraph and The Boundary Sentinel. A tip o’ the hat to them, for sure. All the while, I’m still trying to be a mom – serendipity saw my boy on a school field trip to Calgary that same week. He called and left me a message, saying something had gone amiss (turns out it was nothing, just a SNAFU with the busses at Fort Steele, but I didn’t know that). I tried to call him back – his cell went straight to voicemail. Texted him. No reply. Called again … and again … and again. Nothing. OMG (and THAT, you mean old publisher!). Holy panic, Batman! So there I am, in training with my dignified, revered, respected new employer, which has been a force to be reckoned with since the Crusades, for crying out loud … trying not to freak out and have a complete nutty , thereby proving I’m less “certified” than “certifiable”. (They want me certified in Emergency First Aid, hence the pun). I mean, I wasn’t trying to convince them I’m not crazy – let’s face it, THAT ship had already sailed, given that I was spending so much time with them, and they’re plenty smart themselves … but a panicking Mom outranks the best-credentialed loon in the classiest of psych wards. Still, I had printed up a sheet with the home, work and cell numbers of every responsible adult I know, along with my numbers at the hotel and St. John, and made Dev put, like, a dozen copies of it in his suitcase, his wallet, his jacket pocket …. gave it to the neighbor, the school, the bus driver … so if something WAS really wrong, they’d call me, right? Even so, by the end of the day, I was a basket case. Called my buddy in Calgary for advice, and she set me straight … she spent about an hour pointing out all the precautions I’d taken … how in the worst-case scenario, I would’ve been notified by now. Then she underlined the fact that my son is almost 13 and stuff like this is SUPPOSED to happen … it comes with the territory. “Welcome to parenthood,” she said. I acknowledged her points, but noted that I was so distressed I was using my very few, and oh-so-expensive long-distance cell minutes to check in with her (she should feel privileged I would do so, no?). Skank. She laughed and made note of the many numbers on that lengthy call list I made Dev carry ….how many of those had I already called, she asked? I made staticky noises and hung up, hoping she’d think I had poor cell reception. “Can you hear me now?” Lord, I hope not. I won’t lie to her … but no WAY was I gonna say, “all of them”. No way, no how. I don’t have much pride, but I jealously guard what few stores remain to me, rightly or no. Anyway, it turned out Dev forgot to take his cell charger with him, and the battery died. Unthinkable oversight for a preteen. LOL . This is fun …LOL. LOL. LOL. Oops. Got sidetracked. Sorry. Anyway, all was well, he was happy and having fun, I don’t think I humiliated myself overmuch while training, and the dog is delighted we’re home. So it all shook out. What DIDN’T shake out, is the commitment I’ve made to you, beloved Reader. I was so busy, but that’s no excuse. From here on out, since no one had me committed, I’m here for you. And so is The Source. Talk to you soon, I promise. After all …you need to buy first aid kits from me. LOL. St John Ambulance is not a barrier, but a value addition – they, like The Source, seek to inform people, to educate us all so we can better be safe and healthy, while watchguarding the safety and healthof our families, loved ones and communities. We’re not just NOT conflicts of interest …we’re brethren. Please be patient with me, as I would with you. I love you, I love The Source, I love Castlegar, and I wish only to serve you all, and well. May God guide my efforts to do so. Stayed tuned, if you will. Regards,Kyra HogganEditor
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